Self-Discipline and Peace of Mind

“Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves;they therefore remain bound. The man who does not shrink from self-crucifixion can neverfail to accomplish the object upon which his heart is set. This is true of earthly as of heavenlythings. Even the man whose object is to acquire wealth must be prepared to make greatpersonal sacrifices before he can accomplish his object; and how much more so he whowould realize a strong and well-poised life.” 

—JAMES ALLEN

You require high levels of self-discipline if you truly desire to develop all your inner resources and fulfill your true potential. Throughout the ages, in all religions and philosophies the highest human good or idea has been peace of mind. Your ability to achieve your own peace of mind is the true measure of your success and the key determinant of your happiness.

To develop spiritually, and to become a fully functioning person, you must regularly apply self-discipline and self-control to your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Spiritual development, inner peace, and the experience of joy all require self-mastery and self-control

1. Outer Versus Inner Success

To succeed in the “outer world,” you must discipline yourself to focus and concentrate, work hard at your job, take continuous action toward your goals, and become better and more capable as you move onward and upward in life.

To succeed in the “inner world,” however, requires almost the opposite abilities. To achieve inner peace, you must discipline yourself to let go of everything that can disrupt your sense of inner peace and contentment.

Zen Buddhism teaches that the main cause of human suffering and unhappiness is “attachment.”

People become attached to ideas, opinions, and material things, and then they are reluctant to let go of them. Sometimes people become so preoccupied with these external factors that it affects their mental and physical health—even keeping them awake at night.

When you practice detachment, separating yourself emotionally from things or outcomes, the negative emotions involved stop as well, like unplugging a light from the socket.

2. The Need to Be Right

Most people have a deep down need to be right. However, when you stop caring if you are right or wrong, all the emotions surrounding this need for rightness disappear. Dr. Gerald Jampolsky asked the great question: “Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?”

Some people become passionate about their political or religious beliefs, all of which have been learned from someone else in some way. But when you put those beliefs aside for a while, they lose their ability to stir your emotions or to inflame your anger.

I have friends and meet people with ideas and opinions that range all over the political and religious spectrums. In most cases, we get along well together because we simply put aside the discussion of opinions on which we differ. We consciously and deliberately discipline ourselves to detach from these ideas, and we focus instead on subjects that we agree on and in which we share common interests.

3. Give Up Your Suffering

The second root cause of blaming is justification. This occurs when you tell yourself (and others) why it is that you are entitled to be angry or upset in this situation.

Many people fall in love with their suffering. Their past problems become a primary focus of their lives. They think about what happened all the time. They go through the day and even the night carrying on angry conversations with people who are not present, people who they feel have hurt them in the past.

Whenever they get into a conversation for any period of time, they bring out their suffering, like a trader in a bazaar, and display it to the other person. They then recycle through the unhappy events of their lives, telling what happened, how they were badly treated, and how awful the other person was to have behaved in this way.

However, when you discipline yourself to stop justifying your negative emotions by continually rehashing what happened and what the other person did or didn’t do, and when you instead calmly accept that “stuff happens” in life, your negativity accompanying the other person or situation dies away.

4. Practice Forgiveness

The height of self-discipline in spiritual development is the practice of forgiveness. The Law of Forgiveness says that “you are mentally and emotionally healthy to the degree that you can freely forgive anyone who has hurt you in any way.”

Every person—including you—has experienced destructive criticism, negative treatment, unkindness, rudeness, unfairness, betrayal, and dishonesty from others over the years. These events are unfortunate, but they are an inevitable and unavoidable part of being a member of the human race.

The only way you can avoid the problems and difficulties of living in a busy society with many different kinds of people is to live in a cave.

The only question you need to ask and answer after you have had a negative experience is “How long will it take me to get over this event and get on with my life?” This is a decision only you can make. It is one of the most important types of decisions that you make in your own life if you truly want to be happy. What’s more, it is a true test of your mental and spiritual discipline.

 From the book NO EXCUSE by Brian tracy